How to deal with cold callers and your massage business

Earlier this week I got yet another cold call from someone who had got my details from my listing on one of these free massage, beauty therapy or male waxing directories.


It was the usual gambit: So how is it going on that site, Daniel? Are you getting enough business from that listing, Daniel? Of course the answer which you are being pushed into here is "no". (Why do these people always use your name all the time?!)

And then of course the cold caller was well into her stride, how they "work in partnership with Google" and 90 per cent of all search enquiries are made on Google, how they can get my website onto page one. Blah Blah blah. I have heard it all a dozen times before. Normally I just hang up. But this day she caught me with a quiet five minutes and I indulged her.

All these people want to do is to manage your Google Adwords campaign, choose the correct words and key phrases to help your website get found and then charge you a fortune for it. I run a massage and male waxing business. How difficult can it be to work out which words someone looking for massage or male waxing would put into a search engine? How about "masssage" or "male waxing"?

In fact, if you use Google Trends you can work out for yourself which words to use. Which gets more hits: "swedish massage" or "sports masssage" Use Google Trends to find out.

Anyway, back to this nuisance cold caller. I told her that I do my own marketing, manage my own Google Adwords, do my own Search Engine Optimisation and I am listed at the top of page one on Google for "massage surrey". She didn't believe me and checked online there and then. That got rid of her pretty quickly as she agreed that there was nothing she could do for me.

And for once I didn't have to hang up on a cold caller.

When can I not have Laser Lipo treatments?

Recently the manufacturers of my Laser Lipo machine updated their advice about when you can or cannot have Laser Lipo inch-loss treatments.

You will not be able to be treated for Laser Lipo if you have a contagious or infectious disease, full-blown AIDS, liver or disease, epilepsy, hypertension, an immune suppressed disorder, type 1 (insulin-dependent)diabetes, hyperthyroidism, heart problems, a pacemaker or cancer (or a history of cancer). Neither will you be able to be treated if you are undergoing radiation therapy, are under the uncontrolled influence of recreational drugs or alcohol or you are pregnant.

You will need to get your doctor's written permission before you can have a Laser Lipo treatment if you have hypothyroidism (controlled by thyroxine), rheumatism, type 1 (controlled) or type 2 diabetes, polycystic ovaries, hormone problems, gastric ulcers, metal implants, psychological conditions, a photo-sensitive skin disorder, bell's palsy,have any dysfunction of the nervous system (eg Muscular Sclerosis, Parkinson's Disease or Motor Neurone disease), anaphylaxis or undiagnosed lesions


You will also need written permission from your doctor if you have had surgery or a minor operation within the past 6 weeks, have been injured recently and are awaiting surgery or treatment, are taking anti-seizure medication, are an HIV carrier are currently breast feeding or you are suffering from or being treated for clinical depression.

If none of the above applies to you I look forward to seeing you for a treatment of Laser Lipo in Woking soon.